Grief is Something We Move Forward With, Not Get Over With

Walter Aguilar

Walter Aguilar


There were ways I could grow through this loss...

Losing someone we love is one of the hardest things we go through in life. It feels like our hearts are
breaking into a million pieces, and we are left feeling lost and alone. If you are going through this pain, I
want you to know that you are not alone. Grief is a natural part of being human, and it is okay to feel all
the emotions that come with it.

I know from personal experience just how tough it can be. When my son Amir passed away on Nov.14,
2020, a month shy of his 21 st Birthday, it felt like a piece of me was torn away. I was overwhelmed with
sadness, confusion, fear, and anger all at once. But as time went on, I realized that I did not have to stay
stuck in that dark place.

There were ways I could grow through this loss and find some light again. I went into 4 months of deep
soul grieving (In every meditation I allowed myself to cry for one full song of my meditation music). I
went public with my grief, by creating a grief profile and sharing some of my feelings and thoughts on
social media.

The following are some things I have learned and wish to share from my journey with grief:
Firstly, take your time to grieve. There is no rush, and everyone’s journey is different. Allow yourself to
feel whatever emotions come up. Cry when you need to, sit in the silence of meditation, and feel the
sadness, or write it all down in a journal. Poems, spoken words, drawings, random thoughts, it does not
matter. It is cathartic and can help release some of the pain.

Remember to be gentle with yourself. It is easy to put pressure on ourselves to “get over it” or “move
on,” but healing takes time.

“Grief is not something we get over with, it’s something we move forward with.”

Take care of your basic needs, eat well, try to get some decent sleep, and do things that bring you
comfort and pleasure. Surround yourself with people who support you and understand what you are
going through. Who have earned the right to hear your vulnerability. They can hold space for you
without trying to make it all better for you. They allow you to cry, be angry or express any emotion or
thoughts that you may be feeling in the moment.

Reach out to friends, family, or even online support groups. Connecting with others who have
experienced similar loss can be incredibly comforting.

Finding ways to honor and remember your loved one can also help in the healing process. Create a
special ritual or a memory box filled with photos, letters, or objects that remind you of them. Write a
letter to them, expressing your feelings, or visit their favorite spot to feel their presence. These little acts
of remembrance can bring a sense of connection and keep their memory alive.

Lastly, do not hesitate to seek professional help if you feel overwhelmed or stuck in your grief. Talking to
a therapist, counselor, or a wellness coach can provide guidance and support as you navigate through
this challenging time. They can help you work through complicated emotions or create a personalized
healing plan.

Remember, healing does not mean forgetting or letting go of your loved one. It means finding a way to
carry them with you as you continue your journey. They will always be a part of you, and by growing
through your loss, you honor their memory and find strength within yourself.

Remember, you are not alone in this journey. Reach out to those around you, take care of yourself, and
allow yourself to heal at your own pace. Take one step at a time and have faith that you will find your
way through the darkness and that you will find your smile again.


Let's Connect!

Please feel free to book a complimentary 30 min or 60 min